War of the worlds
by Gooey
Summary: A story about how the smashers all turn in on each other. Did I mention it has nothing to do with war of the worlds, the movie?
1. Chapter 1: The war begins

**War of the worlds**

**a smashy style**

Okay, I am saying that this is my first story ever posted by me, so, um… please don't be critical (like you would be). This is a story and, um, yeah.

So anyway, it all started of one sunny, peaceful morning when Peach woke up in her castle.

"Isn't it a nice day?" she said to herself.

She tiptoed out of the room to find Yoshi awake and running like mad.

"Good morning Yoshi!" she said with joy not noticing that there were heaps of goombas and koopas chasing him.

"Arrararararara" Exclaimed Yoshi.

And that was what happened with those two.

Meanwhile, on Mario's side of the story…

Mario was in the bar.

"We have a bar-a?"

"Now we do," Said a Paratroopa at the bar, "here, have a whisky."

"I like-a whisky?" asked Mario.

"Now you do." Said the Paratroopa.

"Hi Paper Mario, hi Paper Luigi," said Mario, "wait a minute, is there a Paper Luigi?"

"Now there is." Said the Paratroopa.

"Is this getting repetitive?"

"Maybe." Said Toad.

Suddenly, everyone heard an ararararaarara!

Our hero, Mario, rushed upstairs!

So did Luigi, but since nobody likes Luigi, he fell out a window and everybody celebrated.

_**EXIT LUIGI**_

Meh, nobody cares.

Luigi came back to life.

Everybody threw tomatoes at him.

_**Um… UNEXIT LUIGI**_

Anyway, Mario came upstairs to find an inflatable Peach had fallen out of a window, not that he realised it was fake.

"What happened Yoshi?" he said.

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi!" _Translated: _Peach was kidnapped! What are we going to do?

"You're right Yoshi, Peach is dead!" Said Mario.

Yoshi smacked his head.

2 days later…

"Peach was a um… 'Good' princess. Blah blah blah the end." Said a koopa in a rabbi costume.

"I must tell Bowser and DK to not attempt stealing Peach." Said Mario a bit uncomfortably to Luigi. They walked to Bowser's evil lair of doom!

Mario went in.

"Bowser? Don't steal peach" Said Mario sadly.

"Okay" Said Bowser helping DK tie up Peach.

"2 days ago I fell out of a window as a fan toy!" Said Peach in joy.

Bowser was in his evil lair of doom.

"I'm so sick of stealing Peach", said Bowser to DK,"it seems I've been doing it in every game I'm in."

"Why don't we catch a princess called banana?" said DK in his glum, dumb, voice.

"That's stupid." Said Bowser.

"_You're_ stupid!" Said DK.

"You're more stupid than your mother!" said Bowser.

"I don't have a mother!" Said DK.

"How dare you lie about your mum!" Said DK's mother while slapping DK.

"Um… Let's go fishing!" DK said.

"Great idea!" Said Bowser.

"And you too! You turtle that calls apes stupid!" Said DK's mother slapping Bowser.

They walked along while DK's mother went to put DK up for adoption.

Let's forget about her. So, on the trip…

DK tripped.

"That hurt." He said.

"So does this!" Bowser said punching DK in the head.

Well, they caught fish "happily" together.

"It doesn't seem right without Peach." Said Mario.

"Yeah, no more squealing when I'm asleep." Luigi said pleasantly.

"I wonder what Bowser feels like?" Mario asked.

"Me too." Said Luigi.

They walked to Bowser's evil lair of doom!

When they got there, they saw a figure with the keys for the evil lair of doom!

They watched and saw the figure take a princess out of the evil lair of doom!

"We should investigate. And also get this guy to stop making exclamation marks every time we reference the phrase 'evil lair of doom'!" Whispered Mario.

They went close and saw Yoshi taking peach and running towards them.

"He's saving her!" Said Luigi.

Yoshi got to them.

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi yoshi hup ararararararar!" He said.

_Translated: _Follow me! Go to the lair of doom! Look!

They followed Yoshi into the lair of doom!

Luigi ran in before Yoshi got there.

He screamed.

Yoshi and Mario realised the guy they referenced before killed him off.

He was shot.

Yes, shot.

I'll give you all a moment to take that in.

_**EXIT LUIGI**_

Everyone celebrated.

Including Mario.

And for the sake of it…**_EXIT SONIC_**

I was actually going to use him in the climax, but it's all worth it.

Anyway…

"Yoshi!"

_Translated: _Look!

It was Samus, the bounty hunter.

"Why-a did you shoot Luigi?"

"First of all, the author wanted to kill him of," Said Samus,"secondly, I don't like him."

"Why did you come?" Said Mario.

"I've never tasted a mushroom in my life. I came to eat one but I accidentally ate Toad's head. He punched me and I loaded my blaster with a super missile… You get the point." Said Samus, "Well, I'd better get going."

She walked to the ship and accidentally dropped a power bomb. She flew away in the ship unaware of the explosion a few seconds later.

Soon, she came back.

"I believe I dropped a power bomb." She said, "Oh, it's exploded."

She went to Zebes and started to shoot geemers.

Mario wanted revenge.


	2. Chapter 2: Why not KFC?

**War of the worlds**

**a smashy style**

Now you would probably be wondering why it is called a war. Last chapter was all the "how **the war** started" stuff. This chapter is **the war**. And, um, well, read. There is an unfunny bit. I am so so sorry.

Mario was furious at Samus Aran. He was about to prove himself a hero by driving out Samus but she told a blatant story about mushrooms and dropped a power bomb.

"AAARRGH!" he bellowed.

Luigi came in.

"Mario, were going to the smash mansion." He said, not noticing the vase which Mario was aiming at him.

"Oh yeah, by the way, were going now."

Mario stormed off to the smash mansion.

At the smash mansion…

Mario was talking to Kirby.

"Kirby, you must help us in a war for justice."

"NO WAY!" shouted Kirby.

"But our home is helpless."

"You can sell the castle."

"I'll pay you in food."

"Did you say…? SURE! I'll help!"

Master Hand came and called Mario to come to the office.

"Did you say you were going to declare war?" gasped Master Hand.

"Yes, on Samus."

"Oh, you must love Risk! China to Mongolia! Whoa! This must be good!"

In that time, Mario wrote a letter to Samus saying:

Samus,

I want to declare war on you.

Signed, Mario

P.S Thanks for killing Luigi, I needed that.

Mario soon had a whole army of people.

So did Samus.

On the battle field…

The space ships moved forward.

So did DK's mother.

The waddle dees ran around in circles.

Silence.

"CHAAAAAAAAAAAAARRGE!" shouted Bowser.

It was a long battle.

Peppy came.

"I have just made an invention that can teleport you to different stages of time and lots of other places," he said, "though, if stepped on, it will randomly teleport you."

Somebody stepped on it.

Somewhere in deep space…

"Did you say there was a **war**?" Ridley hissed terrifying the zebesians.

"Send in the 1st imperial squad!" he bellowed.

"I'm afraid that they have stopped at McDonald's." said a messenger.

"Send in the 2nd imperial squad!" he roared.

"Same thing."

"The 3rd then!"

"Same."

"The rest of the soldiers then!"

"All gone."

"Why are they there anyway?"

"You sent them."

"I did?"

_**START FLASHBACK**_

"It seems the detection of Samus shooting geemers was wrong." A soldier said to Ridley.

"You've done all your work, so blow your self out! Go to McDonald's or something."

"YES SIR!" said all the soldiers.

_**END FLASHBACK**_

"Where is this **war** anyway?"

Suddenly, all the Nintendo characters except for Luigi and Sonic, appeared fighting.

"C'mon!" said Ridley, excited.

You know that invention Peppy made before? Someone stepped on it again.

In a galactic McDonald's…

All was silent.

The soldiers were munching on their meals.

The ships outside were in a normal traffic jam.

All was silent.

BLZRRKT! Went a ship which randomly appeared confronting the massive McDonald's outlet.

The ship blew up.

"Attack! Soldiers, attack!" said Ridley.

Kirby swallowed Ridley and got his powers which can't be explained, even with the Kirby TV series.

"I can shoot fire balls now." He said in joy.

Kirby accidentally shot the invention thingamajig.

Everyone was in a dark place.

It had burning torches everywhere.

A roar was heard.

In a voice like Luigi's.

"Yoshi yoshi yoshi? Yoshi yoshi…" _The underworld? That can only mean…_

Pichu had gone missing.

Somewhere, off in the distance, munching was heard.


	3. Chapter 3: Stupid Pichu

**War of the worlds**

**a smashy style**

Your probably wondering why I did not say EXIT PICHU. He could have survived I could've exited him in this one if I wanted. The fact is he wouldn't disappear because he and all other smashers are in the underworld, but that doesn't mean they've been exited. Anyway, this chapter's about Yoshi turning into Godzilla, atoms, dandruff making shampoo and giant Luigi clones. I **will** somehow explain it but for now, it's all good.

Mario screamed.

Pichu was gone.

A roar like Luigi's was heard.

More screams.

None from anyone Mario could see.

These screams were coming from a bend in the big cave-like structure they were in.

Mario went around it.

Another scream.

It was Pichu, watching Alfred Hitchcock's movie Psycho and crunching popcorn.

"I thought someone ate you!" said Mario, sighing.

A giant Luigi ate him.

_**EXIT PICHU**_

The fact is, they're in the underworld so Pichu reappeared unharmed, but very green.

Then Mario realised that there were many giant Luigis. And many giant clones of people.

"How could this-a happen?" he pondered.

Peppy also realised that too.

But, he knew how this happened.

"Inventions go to the underworld?" he pondered.

"Smashers and Nintendo characters! Using my machine we can turn big and stand alongside those Luigis!"

Yoshi used it and turned into a big Yoshi, but acted like Godzilla.

"Oops," said Peppy, "I forgot to explain the drawbacks of a particular product of this chemical used in my machine."

Yoshi ran off.

Mario was next.

"This is not-a working!"

"Oops, it ran out of electricity." Said Peppy.

Peppy got new batteries.

"Now, here you go!"

Suddenly, there was a big flash.

"How come everything's bigger now?" said Captain Falcon and Samus at the same time.

"Jinx-"said Captain Falcon.

Samus kicked him in the groin, sending him backwards into Pichu, making him fall off a cliff.

_**EXIT PICHU**_

her?

How many times am I gonna do that?

Ah, well.

cough

Um…

Maybe you can skip the long paragraph being used as a filler.

Ducks consume the most in the whole world (when you actually thought it was Sonic and his **_REEEEAAALY_** boring games.) From ducks to bad charts made by me on Microsoft® Excel and even mathematicians! It's terrible the way they don't eat chickens but do eat KFC! KFC employees are quitting and living like millionaires!

I am so, so sorry.

Yet again, Pichu reappeared unharmed, but greener than usual.

"Let's move on-" moaned Link.

"But everythin's constantly growin!" shouted Young Link.

"Or otherwise –" said Fox.

"Were shrinking!" said Young Link, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Fox and Young Link screamed.

By the time Young Link stopped screaming, they were the size of atoms.

The force of Young Link's voice blew up the atoms.

"Uh-oh." Said someone.

Actually, that someone was an inanimate object.

No-one knows that though.

**5 entries found for _inanimate_.**

**in·an·i·mate** ( P ) **Pronunciation Key** (n-n-mt)  
_adj._

Not having the qualities associated with active, living organisms. See Synonyms at dead.

Not animated or energetic; dull.

_Grammar._ Belonging to the class of nouns that stand for nonliving things: _The word car is inanimate; the word dog is animate._

Anyway, the atoms blew up.

Peppy quickly found the problem, reversed the way the batteries were facing and everyone turned back to normal.

(Except Pichu who was green.)

"Pichu pichu!" Pichu scowled after facing death two times.

Samus was wondering why everyone looks like Luigi.

_**START FLASHBACK**_

"Hey, Luigi, whazzup?" asked Samus.

"I am making a new type of shampoo." He said.

"What's in it?" she asked.

"Um… Promise you don't tell anybody." He said

"Kay." She said.

"Well all these particular chemicals such as…"

A few hours later…

"Isn't that a formula to make dandruff making shampoo that turns you into giant Luigis?" asked Samus.

"Um…… Gotta go." Said Luigi, running off at speeds not possible that defied the laws of physics and gravity.

_**END FLASHBACK**_

"Guys," said Samus, "these people look like Luigi because they tried out a formula for his shampoo! If we use Head and Shoulders™ we can destroy all the Luigis!"

"Can we use magic?" asked Zelda.

"No," said Samus, "Only Head and Shoulders™ and cool laser beams. Besides, I'm making an ad for the brand that makes that stuff! I'll be rich!"

Zelda threw a dagger at Samus, Samus dodged, and the dagger hit Pichu, not killing him, but wounding him, so Zelda used her fancy magic, revived Pichu, didn't notice the giant bottle of dandruff making shampoo about land on him, let it too late, Pichu died again but reappeared unharmed but green, and Samus made me stop using these annoyingly long sentences.

Sorry.

_**EXIT AND ENTER PICHU**_

I can't be stuffed doing this anymore.

I'll go to Texas instead!

Oh that is the lamest suggestion I have ever told my conscience to do.

Meh, doesn't matter.

Kirby was busy sucking and blowing with his super cool, flimsy mouth.

I am so, so sorry about saying that Kirby sucks.

At least it's better than any other game in the whole wide universe.

Deep space…

"If they're all at McDonald's, I guess… it's… PARTY TIME!"

Shouted Ridley at the top of his lungs.

Everyone (except Ridley) got drunk and shot each other.

A truly wrecked McDonald's outlet…

"I heard a bunch of people get drunk and shoot each other!" said a zebesian from the 1st imperial squad.

They shot each other.

Back In the underworld…

A giant Luigi was coming towards the smashers.

Kirby came and sucked in the Luigi.

And everyone else.

**THE END.**

For now…


	4. Chapter 4: Fin

**War of the worlds**

**a smashy style**

I can't be stuffed to write an author's note here. I can't because I am a bad boy, and if I was stuffed I potentially couldn't move any limbs. Also, if I was stuffed, I couldn't write this author's note! But that means I can be stuffed to make an author's note. Meh. Put your face in the computer and prepare for boredom. Note: I will not do "Jig jig!" or "Pika!" I will use English.

Everyone was frightened by the voice.

**_I WILL KILL YOU! _**It said.

Suddenly, Samus jumped out of Kirby's mouth and started shooting.

"Stupid telepathy," she said.

"Are you sure that was telepathy?" said Link.

"Where is the voice coming from?" said Samus.

A Psyduck called swererdess jumped out of Zelda's Poke ball and bit something.

Mewtwo fell onto the ground, in pain.

Jigglypuff was looking at swererdess sweetly.

"Hey Jigs! What are you doing?" said Pichu, relieved that he wasn't green.

Jigglypuff still stared at swererdess.

"Jigglypuff?" said Pikachu.

"I'm gonna marry him!" said Jigglypuff.

"Jigglypuff! You can't marry an untrained Psyduck!" said Pikachu, "And anyway, you need to propose to him first!"

Jigglypuff showed him an engagement ring.

"I'm gonna go up to him and propose, and our engagement will be for two seconds!" she said, smiling blissfully.

"Um…" said Pichu.

"No." said Pikachu.

"People!" said Roy, "We have bigger things to worry about than Mewtwo! We're stuck in the middle of time, and Peppy's machine doesn't work!"

"Well, if we get an electric charge that can give it power, it might work sooner or later." Said Peppy.

Pikachu ran up to the machine, and blasted it with electricity.

Nothing happened.

"It seems we need a positive and negative charge that the wires can run through," said Peppy.

"Hey, Kirby!" said Yoshi, (in yoshi language,) "Do you still have those assorted Pokemon?"

"Yes…" said Kirby.

"Do you have a Plusle and Minun?" said Yoshi.

"Yes…" said Kirby.

The electrical charges ran through Plusle and Minum.

Everyone landed in a rather disorganised planet that had been almost blown up. It was almost if they were re-living Super Metroid, a popular game on the SNES. Though, the fact that there was a crashed space ship that was big enough to hold more than 10 SA-X made it more likely they were on SR388.

"Lolz," said Samus, "I mean, seriously, the next thing you know, the Metroid Queen is gonna show up!"

The Metroid Queen scrambled out of a hole, then ran away and stole a space ship from the Federation.

"Check that," said Link.

"To get out of here and make an unlikely self destruct sequence, we need to get to the final boss lair," said Samus.

They did.

"Now we have to defeat the boss!" said Samus.

"Didn't the boss just run away in a spaceship?" asked Falco.

Samus shot a look at Falco, and Falco backed away slightly.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, Dark Samus, Ridley, and a SA-X appeared.

Samus poked her tongue out at Falco.

"Um…" said Samus.

All of the bosses looked at Samus.

"I'll leave you to it," said Samus.

All the bosses killed each other.

The self destruct sequence began.

"Quick! This way!" said Samus.

They came to a dead end.

"Stupid collapsing door that collapsed last time," said Samus.

**THEY ALL DIED**

**Fin.**


End file.
